no you cant smoke seaweed
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
