Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
try to milk me bitch
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