i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
