the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
