Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize