My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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