Pregnant stripper...not hot.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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