I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Randomize