When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize