We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize