wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
