He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
