Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
