They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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