I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Houston, we have a squirter
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
