Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
