sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
