U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize