sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
