I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize