it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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