i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
