OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
