Sry I called you an 8
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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