That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
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the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
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I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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