She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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