I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Randomize
