its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
