everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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