Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
