my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
