I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
