I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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