i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize