That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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