So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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