we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
What drink are we having for lunch?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
