I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Is it penis luge time yet?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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