he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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