Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.