i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize