Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
