Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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