only if we run a train.
done.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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