mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
