How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
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My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
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Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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