I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
