HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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