I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
