I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
