Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
